Kids say the darndest things...

Lorewalker_Cho

Oh my, what a wonderful thread. It would be a pity to lose it, I'll just add it to my collection.

Wendy

My 3 y.o. cracked me up so much the other day, he is totally annoyed at being the youngest, it's a common source of comic relief around here.  So the other day he is complaining about I don't know what that he is not allowed to do that older brother can do, and he gives the biggest sigh and goes "my years go by so slowly"

I was both laughing out loud and completely blown away at his existential crisis.  Kids really are amazing. 

freeboro

I have a 4 y.o. as well and he cracks me up constantly and amazes me with the questions he asks.  A couple weekends ago he says "Daddy, what's dehydration?"  I was blown away by that!

He also forgets nothing.  If you make a promise to him, you better keep it because he'll call you out on it!

Version3

My counselor works with a lot of kids, and he said bedtime is an issue for kids until they get older because of separation anxiety and sometimes even an unconscious fear of death. Kids don't trust going to sleep the way we adults have learned to. FWIW, this may help you have some insight into why it's a struggle. It gave me a lot of sympathy,a nd more patience for the process, although I learned this when the boys were older.

picard

Purple said:

@Chief_TC ... 7 year olds can get hardens?! I figured that didn't really happen until puberty......

I love your response to it though )

They can happen at any age, even newborn babies can get them.

Version3

Chief_TC said:

Right, it's nothing sexual. A hard penis is it's normal relaxed state.

Gotta remember to use this line with my next GF.

freeboro

You apparently don't get him dressed in the morning...LOL  That's all I'm saying.

mrsozzy

Many years ago when our son was 2 or 3 we were on one of our first plane trips with him.  Everyone was a little tired and cranky. He had a cold, so I was fussing over him--wiping his nose, chapstick etc. Apparently he got tired of it; he looked at me a little disdainfully and said, "Worry about yourself!"

I think the kid was telling me to MAP!

)

Angeline

Purple said:

Earlier today, I was listening to some music while making up some dishwater, and the fan from the A/C had just turned on in the laundry room while the door was open.

My son comes bursting into the kitchen, covers his ears with his hands and says,

"I can't hear a thing with all this racket!"

My son used to tell me to turn the car radio down LOL

Angeline

Five year old big sister, to three year old little brother: "When I was little, I couldn't do that either. You'll know how when you get bigger."

freeboro

My son is always covering his ears.  He will often say "Daddy, can you turn down the radio please?" when we're in the truck and I don't listen to it that loud.  Cracks me up.

romanceauthor

My daughter counts 1...2...2... and then jumps off of things. She can count to ten without a problem so I asked her why she won't count to 3. "Because I'm not three yet, momma." Well, can't argue with that logic. 

Hamster_Free

4yo son is the riot in our house too..
When he pops a chubby while playing with his sister, he'll show it off and say "He's getting gas!"
When really ticked off once, he got into a good dramatic stomp..then paused to feel his brow to make sure it was properly furrowed..then resumed his stomp.
Can't carry the hamper of clothes down the stairs to the laundry because "His arms are tired." When I reply that it must be time for a nap so that his arms and everything else can rest, he assures me, "Oh, no, it's just my arms.  My body is wide awake."

PhoenixDown

Our 3 year old has said some amusing stuff in her life... She had 2 year old dyslexia for a while, my favorite short-lived phrase of her was "burger hammer" (hamburger).

Lately she's been telling Grandpa "When I was your age..."

The boys only have two words. The troublemaker's first word was "no" and the chill kid's first words were "thank you". I am not surprised.

Maria

mrsozzy said:

Many years ago when our son was 2 or 3 we were on one of our first plane trips with him.  Everyone was a little tired and cranky. He had a cold, so I was fussing over him--wiping his nose, chapstick etc. Apparently he got tired of it; he looked at me a little disdainfully and said, "Worry about yourself!"

I think the kid was telling me to MAP!

)

And now 13 years later, that's still what I hear from my teenage daughter all the time...
Some things never change.

Maria

freeboro said:

My son is always covering his ears.  He will often say "Daddy, can you turn down the radio please?" when we're in the truck and I don't listen to it that loud.  Cracks me up.

I happen to like Muse. And I turn the stereo on really loud when I'm listening to , say, Hysteria.
First there's some bumping on the wall and then my 18 year old son would come in my room: "You call that music? That's just obnoxious noise! Can't you turn that down for crying out loud? Please?"

I find that hilarious - I mean, that's supposed to be my text as a mother of two teenagers, isn't it?

Athol_Kay

Eldest daughter on greeting me one morning.

 

"I see that my assassins have failed again."

PhoenixDown

@athol_kay, Father of the Decade.

Yolo

Chief_TC said:

My 7 year old recently discovered his hard on. He was sitting next to me on the couch the other night, figgeting  with his pajamas. I wasn't paying much attention. I look over at one point and his face has a look of both concern and relief on it.

I ask him what's up and he says' "it's okay, it went back down" I say, "what?" He says "my thing was up, but it's down now"

Only thing that I could think to say at the time was, "I told you to keep you hands out of your damn pants."

Reminds me of a time when one of my young (at that time) sons was in the tub with his mom watching him. Same thing, he discovered he could give himself a hard on.  When his mom finally told him to stop playing with himself, he replied " Why mommy? Nobody else is going to do it for me".

Akatsukami

Yolo said:

Reminds me of a time when one of my young (at that time) sons was in the tub with his mom watching him. Same thing, he discovered he could give himself a hard on.  When his mom finally told him to stop playing with himself, he replied " Why mommy? Nobody else is going to do it for me".

You must break him of this blue-pill attitude immediately!

PhoenixDown

Our 3 year old has a habit of saying "yes" to whatever we ask her. Yesterday, she agreed that she went to the moon, and told @ozzy and @mrsozzy all about it. She went to Vegas too, apparently.