Wife mentioned having a date night - I blew off the idea because of what happened last time. Bad?

Frank_London

1. Have a date night.  For god's sake, what the hell are you holding out for? YOLO as the young people say.
2. Don't over-plan. don't build it up to be too much; you're not 18 any more, you don't have to go to any night clubs that open after 11pm.
3. Do not expect sex; this is not about sex, it's about you two reconnecting and learning to enjoy each other's company.
4. Give her a good kiss at some point during the date night. Tell her how great she looks.
5. if she wants to go shopping at the mall, like last time, say "no." That's not what date night is for.

It's that simple.

Sisyphus

Frank_London said:

1. Have a date night.  For god's sake, what the hell are you holding out for? YOLO as the young people say.
2. Don't over-plan. don't build it up to be too much; you're not 18 any more, you don't have to go to any night clubs that open after 11pm.
3. Do not expect sex; this is not about sex, it's about you two reconnecting and learning to enjoy each other's company.
4. Give her a good kiss at some point during the date night. Tell her how great she looks.
5. if she wants to go shopping at the mall, like last time, say "no." That's not what date night is for.

It's that simple.

I'll add a bit to this.  Date night means you're in the driver's seat.  Getting dragged around the mall if you don't want to just sucks AND you're in her frame.  You could flip it and have some fun by just looking at things differently.  Something I've done recently was I said sure, you can do a bit of shopping but I have one rule - anything I want you to try on, you have to try on and come out of the dressing room for me to see.  She agreed - reluctantly.

I started out by finding the ugliest thing I could find and making her try it on - it was bad - and we both knew it.  But it was fun, made her laugh and I was able to tease her (cocky/funny).  Then I started wandering into stores and having her try on some more sexy, risque stuff.  I gave her a "you know the rule - you get punished later if you don't try it on" line.  Again, a bit of blushing from her but she got some whispered, growling "fuck, that makes you look hot" kind of comments from me.  

Did it lead to sex?  Once yes, the other time no.  We live 30-45 minutes away so by the time we got home, chatted/paid to the babysitter and got to bed she was tired and we'd kind of lost the mojo.  Good news, I got morning sex for the first time in ages the next day!

HildaCorners

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