Too Beta

better_manbetter_man USMember Posts: 6

I received the following text from my GF of 10 months.  At first I was flattered.  Then it struck me this sound beta.  I've worked hard the past 18 months on alpha.  I don't want a "relapse".  How should the text be interpreted? 

text:...Not once do I ever feel your prying...just concerned...
I ask a lot of questions, as well..
If ever I ask too many just tell me to shut up ..Lol

Comments

  • countrygirlycountrygirly SCMember Posts: 48
    Did u say something before she sent this? Hard to say whats going on with 1 text, what was the rest of the conversation? 
    Katt[Deleted User]Frank_London
  • SaigoTakamoriSaigoTakamori FLSilver Member Posts: 3,075
    Hello

    If you were to post a triage we could better help you.
    Sweat More...bitch less
    Fate favors the prepared.
    HildaCorners
  • better_manbetter_man USMember Posts: 6
    Im new here.  Let me try this again.  The text message in which my GF may see me as beta:

    Not once do I ever feel your prying...just concerned...
    I ask a lot of questions, as well..
    If ever I ask too many just tell me to shut up ..Lol. 
    I am SOooooo very thankful to have someone like you ,that's just easy you get it, understand,smart, compassionate, all and then some...I don't think you realize how much I love that about you ..your just easy in all ways.
  • dalefdalef Silver Member Posts: 1,963
    @better_man It's sound very positive to me. Athol teaches a combination of beta and alpha; I think you have hit the sweet spot here.
  • HildaCornersHildaCorners Winter? You call *that* winter?Gold Women Posts: 3,377
    Welcome!

    Though old habits die hard, we try not to talk "alpha" or "beta" here. Instead, Athol uses the terms Attraction and Relationship Comfort.

    For a one night stand, Attraction is enough. But for a long term relationship, you need to provide that comfort as well.

    There are different types of Attraction and Relationship Comfort. Different people need different mixes of them. But any relationship that's going to last beyond a long weekend needs both, and from both partners.

    The text sounds like she's looking for you to lead the relationship. Nothing "beta" about that.

    Enneagram 5w4.  I'm researching what that means, before designing t-shirt art about it.

    "I feel no shame in making lavish use of the strongest muscles, namely male ones (but my own strongest muscle is dedicated to the service of men - noblesse oblige). I don't begrudge men one whit of their natural advantages as long as they respect mine. I am not an unhappy pseudomale; I am female and like it that way." RAH
  • BenBen Silver Member Posts: 3,651
    Did she text you that apropos of nothing, or was it part of a larger conversation between the two of you?

    It sounds like she's replying to something, and I can't tell much about what she's getting at without knowing what.

    ---

    In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.
    Frank_LondonAngeline
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