Epic Struggle leads to Legendary Success

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  • BetaThanNothingBetaThanNothing Silver Member Posts: 18
    Can you recommend any guided meditations?

    Susan Piver posts one on her Open Heart Project weekly; usually a few minutes of a Dharma talk (Buddhist oriented sermon) and ten minutes of meditation. 

    There are some good ones on Phillip Moffat's site http://dharmawisdom.org/ and his talks are insightful. 

    http://www.freemindfulness.org/download looks like a good resource but I haven't tried it yet.

    Jon Kabat-Zinn has some related to his mindfulness-based stress reduction that can be Googled; I'm not fond of his voice however.

    "The Mindful Geek: Secular Meditation for Smart Skeptics" by  Michael W. Taft is a good recent book. It provides a scientific footing for many of the meditation techniques I've been exposed to and a few techniques that are new to me. 

    And his guided meditations are up on his site! Last time I checked they weren't there.

    http://themindfulgeek.com/guided/

    It's important to find someone whose voice you like for guided meditations; if it grates on you then it's hard to focus.

    Also, that butchered quote in original post was from a talk by Sharon Saltzberg.

    BourneAgainUlysses
  • RebornReborn LondonGold Men Posts: 2,987
    I would second the recommendation of Susan Piver's "open heart project"
    Enneagram type 5 w6. 
    If I offer lots of advice, it's probably really me giving advice to myself. That always seems to happen. 
    Ulysses
  • UlyssesUlysses AbroadSilver Member Posts: 53
    Thanks much, @BetaThanNothing and @Reborn , I'll check these out. Like @Husband3point0 I've been struggling to learn how to meditate, I'm hoping it'll help with insomnia, anxiety, etc.
    OzLion
  • BetaThanNothingBetaThanNothing Silver Member Posts: 18
    @Ulysses: best of luck with your practice. As @stillasamountain said, the effects are deep but slow and subtle. "Bad" meditations are my most important. If I'm able to hold on and continue I strengthen my practice, and they tell me a lot about my current mental state if I'm able to listen. 

    One last recommendation for guided meditations; the HeadSpace app: https://www.headspace.com/.  It's paid has aa free introduction to mindfulness meditation in the form of ten ten minute meditations. I tried them, they are an excellent introduction.
  • UlyssesUlysses AbroadSilver Member Posts: 53
    Thanks so much, @BetaThanNothing . For a few months I was trying to meditate each day but felt I was getting nowhere, so gave up. You and @stillasamountain have convinced me to return to it. Two days so far, mostly using guided meditations on a cell phone app, Insight Timer, but I will try these too.
  • beribbonedberibboned caMember Posts: 359
    @Husband3point0 I want to highly recommend to you and or your wife Jillian Keenan's memoir Sex with Shakespeare: Here's Much to Do with Pain but More with Love. Keenan is a serious journalist and this is an eloquent memoir of growing up with a sexuality hard to talk about. 
  • stillasamountainstillasamountain CT, USASilver Member Posts: 521
    edited August 12
    @Ulysses

    Just came across these videos and I figured this was as good a place as any to drop the links. The first two are golden but they are all good. I have dozens of books on meditation, have sat formally and regularly in a Zendo and gone on retreat. In my opinion, you could transcribe that first 2 minute video and never have to read another word about the frame / context of meditation or why it's a good thing. Mechanics are another matter but even that is probably 4 or 5 sentences of instruction. At least for the simple mental health improvement aspects that drives most Westerns towards meditation. 

    Lotta condensed wisdom in the videos. Don't fight the mind but don't obey the mind unconditionally, either. Make friends with thoughts and emotions. You need both sitting practice and daily life practice. 10 minutes a day is enough to start with. It's not fierce concentration (too hard) nor is it blissing out (too soft). Rather, it's about awareness. Etc.

    "Short time, many times. 3 seconds, 2 seconds..."

    Give the Monkey Mind a Job... Mingyur Rinpoche


    “She was 3/4 perfection and 1/4 broken glass.”

    TenneeJellyBean
  • HildaCornersHildaCorners Winter? You call *that* winter?Gold Women Posts: 3,377
    Please everyone, check the date on the last post in the thread ... and if it's over a couple months old, start a new thread instead.

    Enneagram 5w4.  I'm researching what that means, before designing t-shirt art about it.

    "I feel no shame in making lavish use of the strongest muscles, namely male ones (but my own strongest muscle is dedicated to the service of men - noblesse oblige). I don't begrudge men one whit of their natural advantages as long as they respect mine. I am not an unhappy pseudomale; I am female and like it that way." RAH
  • Husband3point0Husband3point0 Gold Men Posts: 3,294
    Please everyone, check the date on the last post in the thread ... and if it's over a couple months old, start a new thread instead.
    I think the bigger issue is that this has become a holding pen for a meditation discussion that probably deserves its own thread instead. 
    HildaCorners
  • Husband3point0Husband3point0 Gold Men Posts: 3,294
    @Husband3point0 I want to highly recommend to you and or your wife Jillian Keenan's memoir Sex with Shakespeare: Here's Much to Do with Pain but More with Love. Keenan is a serious journalist and this is an eloquent memoir of growing up with a sexuality hard to talk about. 
    Thanks, but I'm not sure how well this would be received on her end. 
  • stillasamountainstillasamountain CT, USASilver Member Posts: 521
    I think the bigger issue is that this has become a holding pen for a meditation discussion that probably deserves its own thread instead. 
    My apologies for contributing to thread drift. Sorry, man.

    “She was 3/4 perfection and 1/4 broken glass.”

  • Husband3point0Husband3point0 Gold Men Posts: 3,294
    I think the bigger issue is that this has become a holding pen for a meditation discussion that probably deserves its own thread instead. 
    My apologies for contributing to thread drift. Sorry, man.
    I'm not offended by it. Rather, people looking for meditation solutions won't necessarily find this here. So, it's a hidden trove, if you will. 
  • Bob314Bob314 AustraliaSilver Member Posts: 153
    To get back on track... This is an inspiring story. I am probably much like you in many ways.

    I find it interesting that you had 6 months of loyalty testing before she accepted you were here to stay. My wife has high anxiety and I think that any "good change" in me sets her off as well. Which is bad because in response to dread I don't think she jumps in, I think it makes her just feel more worthless.

    The MAP plan is quite broad - is there anything within it you found more or less useful than others?

    If your sex rank is now quite higher than hers, have you noticed any behaviour differences in her?

    And I'm always interested in "Beta from an Alpha frame". Are you able to give examples?

    Thanks
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