This guy is toast

RedPillNeophyte

Just read this article:  http://nymag.com/thecut/2015/07/what-open-marriage-taught-one-man-about-feminism.html

Guy lets his wife sleep with whoever she wants...because feminism (his reasoning, honest!)

The feminist talk is just a smokescreen for this poor guy's hamstering his wife decision to sleep around.  Whatever reasoning he uses, his life is a train wreck waiting to happen. 

Tennee

Wow.  

"I just don't use mine as much as she uses hers"  when speaking about his 'care blanche'.  Oh, I see. You dig the humiliation thing too, huh?  Sit home like a good little boy, and I'll come back and tell you 'hot' stories about how good someone other than you fucked me.  

Eta:  read this through carefully a second time.  Its loaded to the gills with rationalizations, excuses, and apologies from him.   Telling the whole world why it's OK his wife fucks strangers. Toast indeed...

redheaded_woman

Wow....
He's so confused.

TedD

I saw that linked elsewhere a few days back. Still don't have the stomach to read it. I cant begin to fathom the state of mind required for that lifestyle.

seriously

I read it out of morbid curiosity.  It wasn't that bad, other than this guy being a total bitch and letting his wife think for him.  She pushed the agenda and he complied.  No spine.  In fact, she might have written the article for him, with a few little bits about his FEEEEEEELLLLLLINGGGSSSS thrown in.

TedD

It isn't just that she was having sex outside the marriage. She came home and told him about them?! I don't want to know details about guys before me. Why in God's name would he want to listen to stories that happened earlier that evening?  

I guess I'm too old fashioned, misogynistic, controlling, and jealous to be a perfect husband.

People be crazy...

Ben

Ah, man.  Clicked on this hoping it was a thread about this guy:



So disappointed.

Athol_Kay

/shrug

It's just first-person cuckold porn.

There's a huge market for it in porn, why the surprise someone is doing it in reality and/or writing a fictionalized account of it, is confusing.

Tennee

@Athol_Kay said:

/shrug

It's just first-person cuckold porn.

There's a huge market for it in porn, why the surprise someone is doing it in reality and/or writing a fictionalized account of it, is confusing.

What makes me scratch my head is, at my most passive, beta-ist wuss (when I wasn't being Godzilla asshole aggressive in the whole P/A 1-2 combo I had going), under no circumstances would I tolerate this crap.  Um, No.  Bye.

But you explained this in the other (giddy old man) thread with amazing insight.  It's just.....very weird...for lots of us to comprehend; that being made a fool of, completely  surrendering your balls, and getting off on being humiliated is fun.  

But there loads of weirdness in the world I don't understand.  Oh well...

Rorschach

*shudder*

Athol nailed it insofar as the author is concerned, whether is is fictional or not. My first thought on reading it was that he is cloaking his sick fetish as "feminism" to try to give it "progressive" cred., when he is nothing more than a cuckold, pure and simple.

What disturbs me most, however, is the fact that the editors of the magazine in question evidently saw the article as fit to publish, as if it were offering "a point of view" worth considering. My hope is that its publication was motivated by nothing more than prurience. If not, well ...

alcockell

Over on Reddit PPD - we reckoned there was a subtext of "... the longed-for bullet was entering his brain... WInston loved Big Brother" 

r9stone

Jeebus, there's 4 minutes of my life I'll never get back.

"I didn't bang a bunch of dudes before I married you and now that I'm in my 30's I need to make up for missed opportunities, cause like, feminism and stuff."

"Sure thing babe, whatever you want to do. Happy wife, happy life!"

Said no sane man ever.

TedD

@Athol - true about cuckold porn. But porn is fantasy. Random men playing hide the salmi with your wife? Not so much. I can see how the fantasy could be alluring, but literally having to mentally visualize my wife with another guy would likely send me postal.  Even IF I could get past the morality of it, I'm far too possessive  As I always say: I'm an only child. I never learned to share my toys.

Athol_Kay

TedD said:

@Athol - true about cuckold porn. But porn is fantasy. Random men playing hide the salmi with your wife? Not so much. I can see how the fantasy could be alluring, but literally having to mentally visualize my wife with another guy would likely send me postal.  Even IF I could get past the morality of it, I'm far too possessive  As I always say: I'm an only child. I never learned to share my toys.

Same. I get it.

But if this forum has proved nothing over the last three years, is people will tolerate the most horrific situations for years on end before seeking help.

We are all capable of incredible self-deception.

fredless

Athol_Kay said:

We are all capable of incredible self-deception.

This. 

forestleaf

Wait, so is the consensus here that this guy really exists and is telling the actual truth about his wife and marriage???  Couldn't this all be bullsh*t?

Tennee

@forestleaf said:

Wait, so is the consensus here that this guy really exists and is telling the actual truth about his wife and marriage???  Couldn't this all be bullsh*t?

He only has the one article in NY Mag's author search.  I can't find anything else he's published, but I stopped after 20 seconds because, well, who cares....

I mean, he must be real right?  No bastion of hard-hitting reporting and above reproach journalism like NY Magazine would deceive us in such fashion...

Wait, where did NYT's Jayson Blair wind up? 

Athol_Kay

forestleaf said:

Wait, so is the consensus here that this guy really exists and is telling the actual truth about his wife and marriage???  Couldn't this all be bullsh*t?

It's hard to know for sure.

It kind of reads like a feminist coated cuckold porn story and may be completely fictional.

But even assuming it's true, it's not going to crack my personal top 10 of weird things I've discovered with forum members or had to deal with in coaching calls.

growingafamily

Tennee said:

What makes me scratch my head is, at my most passive, beta-ist wuss (when I wasn't being Godzilla asshole aggressive in the whole P/A 1-2 combo I had going), under no circumstances would I tolerate this crap.  Um, No.  Bye.

But is it fair to say everyone who ever passed through MMSL could say the same? I remember a member who let his wife have an affair when he was going through ED or something. Ultimately I think he left because his marriage fell apart.

Tennee

@growingafamily said:

Tennee said:

What makes me scratch my head is, at my most passive, beta-ist wuss (when I wasn't being Godzilla asshole aggressive in the whole P/A 1-2 combo I had going), under no circumstances would I tolerate this crap.  Um, No.  Bye.

But is it fair to say everyone who ever passed through MMSL could say the same? I remember a member who let his wife have an affair when he was going through ED or something. Ultimately I think he left because his marriage fell apart.

Well, there you go, right?

I can't speak for anyone other than me.  And Me says - NFW.  

Athol_Kay

Chief_TC said:

Better your ears than mine.

As long as people are telling me the truth, nothing really bothers me. It's all about trying to find a way to get people what they want without hurting anyone else.

I need the truth about the ugly stuff, because without it, I can't really help anyone.