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Comments
Remember to play!
Do the right thing, whether anyone is watching or not.
Be married, until you are not.
Email address: angeline.greenwood@att.net
This is a tough one because we have been talking for SO LONG. It was not intentional, in fact we've made plans and had to cancel due to weather. And recently we've been talking a whole lot. I've definitely never talked to anyone for anywhere near this long before meeting them. I've talked to him long enough that he knows and seems to share my nerdy interests. And he was an athlete growing up. And we share very similar senses of humor. I'm not building it up to be anything amazing, I know that you really can't tell until you meet in person, but we'll see how it goes.
Remember to play!
Do the right thing, whether anyone is watching or not.
Be married, until you are not.
Email address: angeline.greenwood@att.net
this is just me .. but I don't get nervous before dates. why? because I'm honest. they say the truth shall set you free .. damn right it does.
a lot of people lie about their age or their weight. and that's why they get scared. when you meet, there's no hiding the weight gain or receding hairline.
if you were upfront about it, you minimize the nervousness and have nothing to be afraid of. own it. when you have been honest about yourself, you can focus your energy on whether you like the other person .. and not spend time thinking of excuses as to why you don't look like your picture or spin an elaborate story of why you don't look that way.
you end up digging yourself into a hole that you won't be able to get out of. it's way too much work to keep a lie going.
and if you're busted? well .. your chances are shot.
I would much rather be with someone who was honest than to be with someone who lied about themselves because .. what else have they been lying about?? can't start any relationship based on lies.
like I said .. that's what works for me.
Having a bit of stage fright and nerves over hoping a date goes well doesn't automatically mean you've lied about your height or your hunchback or your mother waiting in the car. I think a pattern that is emerging from your posts is a need for balance.
FYI if we were going to be sticking around here, we'd encourage - harass you to change your nickname. The ways we refer to ourselves in our heads are surprisingly powerful. So far you haven't been boring at all. Why would you drag yourself down with negative self-talk?
Remember to play!
Do the right thing, whether anyone is watching or not.
Be married, until you are not.
Email address: angeline.greenwood@att.net
i will agree that there is a tinge of negative in my approach. it's like the defeatism that you mentioned in an earlier post. i have to work on that ..
i don't want to hijack the post but i have always felt that guys didn't like me because i was boring. my exH said one of the reasons he was leaving me was because i was boring. and i haven't been interesting enough for any guy to stick around.
I'm going to a different event before we meet up, too. Annual pre-Christmas party at someone's house.
Here's how fat, lazy and slobby I was.
Though I was overweight, I never went over a woman's size 12. I had also lost 15lbs in 6 weeks the summer before we split up.
Lazy: I was the stay at home mom to two active kids, one with learning disabilities. I did all the cleaning, most of the parenting, and filled in the edges when he didn't feel like cooking. I ran a small artisan business, volunteered in the community, took martial arts classes, and oversaw a major home remodel.
After the divorce I tried to grow my business, took two different retail clerk jobs, taught myself a new set of career skills, and now have a good job in that career.
The ex? Lost his job, hasn't been employed for 3 years. Refuses to take jobs below his peak, finds filing for unemployment too stressful.
I could go on ... let's just say I'm not a slob either.
You are as boring as you let yourself be. Don't believe anyone else about your character.
Enneagram 5w4. I'm researching what that means, before designing t-shirt art about it.
"I feel no shame in making lavish use of the strongest muscles, namely male ones (but my own strongest muscle is dedicated to the service of men - noblesse oblige). I don't begrudge men one whit of their natural advantages as long as they respect mine. I am not an unhappy pseudomale; I am female and like it that way." RAH
Have enough items (topics) checked off that you'll never have a boring date. Boring guy, Yes. Boring date, No.
I recently ran a race, and I'm quite active. Health topic on a date? Check.
Soomeone here (wink) recommended "the 4 hour work week" book. Books? Check.
I can name players stats, wins and losses for all local teams. Sports? Yup.
Politics? Recently a date asked me "Don't tell me you voted for Trump?" My response. "I voted, but it doesn't matter who's in office. Because Honey, I'm administration Proof".
One last thing. On second date, I always try to make the topic a little uncomfortable. I gauge her reaction.
You know I give you unbiased advice. That's twice.
I don't think I can count on one hand how many dates I've postponed.
I sure as hell know I've never done it twice with the same person on a first date.
Hey, @LL80 my daughter wants to spend the night. As you know the children come first.
Tell you what, let's at least have a quick drink, coffee, chat etc early then I'll go get her and you can go to your party.
I've gone this long without seeing you that I just don't think I can wait another second!
Comon you can be a little late. You know it'll be more fun than watching Ralph get drunk and make an ass of himself at your office Christmas party.
At least that's how I would've handled it Diane.
Remember to play!
Do the right thing, whether anyone is watching or not.
Be married, until you are not.
Email address: angeline.greenwood@att.net
Numerous times I've moved plans up or back because my boys needed something. But I also have the foresight to typically schedule stuff when there shouldn't be any conflicts.
After bedtime is great. If my boys needed to come over when they were younger I'd tell them sure but boys I made plans and I have to step out for a bit later.
Then we hang out. I cook. They go to bed and I get a sitter for a bit. They don't get short changed and neither does my date.
My being gone for an hour or two while they sleep has zero impact on them.