Saying Goodbye To A Pet

forestleaf

Most vets should have a detailed conversation with you prior to euthanasia about the details.  One, you should sign a form giving your permission to euthanize.  Two, you have choices about what to do with your pet's body afterwards: you can usually take the body with you if you have a place to bury it, or you can choose cremation.  With cremation, usually there is a choice as to whether to have ashes returned to you (and choose container) or to not have ashes returned.  Usually you will pay for services prior to euthanasia so that you can leave the clinic after the euthanasia without stopping at the front desk.  Three, you have the choice to stay and be with your pet or not.  You also have the choice to remain with your pet before the euthanasia or after for AS LONG as you want (as long as the exam room is open).  Four, you need to be prepared for the actual euthanasia.  The vet may or may not sedate prior, and then may or may not place an IV catheter in the pet's leg prior to euthanasia.  Probably 90% of the time the pet will pass away quietly and easily with no muscle movement.  Some euthanasias will move a bit, and some will appear to take a breath a minute or two after death (reflex diaphragmatic contraction).  The rare one will be very uncomfortable to watch (trust me, this is rare) and vocalize loudly.  The euthanasia itself is performed with an overdose of a barbiturate called pentobarbital.  It really is a peaceful way to go, most of the time.  You may or may not have a vet in your area who will travel to your home and euthanize your pet there.  Rural vets will often do this.  Interestingly, in large cities, there are now euthanasia and palliative care services too (a friend of mine does this).  Here is a story of a dog she put to sleep and his last day.

Purple

@Anonime ;
I'm glad you brought that up. I feel like H and I are on the same page about staying with him, but I'll be certain to discuss it beforehand just in case. Especially as this involves kids too, so we have to discuss if we're both comfortable with them being there too or not.

@Avalinette
That is basically how I was planning to approach it. I think it's just easier. The younger boy is likely not going to ask anything about a spirit/soul/whatever, but the older boy isn't completely under our influence anymore (lol; aka he's in school now) and has picked up that some of his friends believe in God, so he may have more questions. He and I had a chat about religion not that long ago and he was asking about Heaven. I just told him I don't believe in Heaven, but some people do and that he is always encouraged to believe in what feels true to him. I fully expect him to ask about doggy heaven or something similar, but I'm sort of hoping he won't.

@forestleaf
Thank you so much for that. That has given

Angeline

I pretty much got every question under the sun from my 5 year old, from why do they die to "what happens to me if you die?!" I thought she was worried about heaven, she was worried where she would go when she got off the school bus. She started sleeping in our room again for a few weeks- we'd wake up and find her on the floor.

There's nothing wrong with fudging a little on the details until they can handle them.

CartB4Horse

I'm sorry to hear you are going thru this; it really is part of a child growing up and one good reason we have pets....

It's a time where our children learn about death, that of an animal and ultimately a loved one.  Doesn't make it any easier to see a pet go.

My wife took our last dog in to be put down.  I didn't know she was going to do it that day or I would have taken care of the guy.  I'll definitely be the one to take our current two dogs in to say one last good bye.

Mrs_Beasley

@forestleaf please don't feel obligated to respond - but I'm needing some advice, and I think you're a vet (?). I have a 16 year old cat who is my first pet (although I know he's not going to live forever in my mind...well... he has to live forever - because I'm not prepared to say goodbye). Twice over the past three days - he has had an "episode" - almost like his limbs are not working properly, he maybe seems to stagger a bit - the episode might last ~10 minutes? To compare to a human, I might say it's more similar to a mild stroke? There has been no incontinence and he is still eating and playing. I of course am going to get him into the vet a.s.a.p - suggestions on tests I might want to run? I don't want to randomly start "googling", largely out of fear. 

forestleaf

@Mrs_Beasley, definitely get him checked out by a vet ASAP. I would suggest looking at aafponline.com to find a feline-exclusive vet if possible.  Regardless, a metabolic disease is likely such as diabetes or thyroid disease, but a neurologic disease (brain or spinal cord) is possible too.  Strokes in small animals are not common although vaguely possible.  Best of luck!

Mrs_Beasley

@forestleaf thanks so much for the response. I had a quick phone call with a vet @ the office where I take my furry family. They were able to get me in tomorrow morning (albeit not with my feline vet who we refer to at the "cat whisperer"). I'll ask them to run his blood work again as a starting point. I had it done a year ago and everything came back excellent. Pending those results I'll take it from there. 

forestleaf

@Mrs_Beasley, one more thing.  If your vet is able to do blood pressure, that would be really important to do.  Hypertension can cause signs like what you saw in your cat.

Mrs_Beasley

@forestleaf I really appreciate your expertise. Blood work came back completely normal and the blood pressure was good. The vet will prescribe an anti-convulsant and if he has another episode, I will begin the medication.

forestleaf

@Mrs_Beasley, if your vet did a blood pressure at all, then he/she is a good vet.  Not many of them do.  Also check that the thyroid levels were checked.  Not included in most regular bloodwork.  And post back.  I'd like to know what happens.

Mrs_Beasley

@forestleaf. Having his blood pressure done was both tragic and terribly cute - the little blood pressure cuff on his leg and hearing his little heart was really cool. Yes thyroid was done, his numbers were right in the middle of the normal range. So what I know is that his heart is good, his blood is good, leaving perhaps something neurological. She suggested it could have been caused by a broken blood vessel, but was leaning toward seizures. I read a bit about feline seizures last night and the seem similar to human seizures - which is nothing similar to what I've seen occur. I cannot justify a feline MRI or CT scan as they are terribly cost prohibitive. So at this point I watch. If he has another episode they've given me the pheno-barb and I will start that and see if it makes a difference. Thanks again for your advice and reassurance.