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Comments
Oh, and throw away that shirt you're wearing in the shots of your face, or keep it only for yard work. It's frumpy. You don't do frumpy any more. Even if you live alone and go to bed alone, start wearing something attractive to bed, with fabric that feels good on your skin, and you'll feel more sensual and attractive. It will help with changing your "I'm homely" mindset, which is your biggest obstacle.
You may want to get a personal shopper at an upscale store to show you an attractive outfit for work and another for going out.
I agree that the problem is mostly in your mind. I had one date with a woman who always seem to hide how attractive she was; don't be that girl.
@LadyOrTheTyger, thank you for the recommendation! I actually tried this hairstyle today, on top of wearing a bit of makeup, heels, and more flattering clothing (dark red tank top with a black shrug). I definitely got a few looks, but I kept finding myself tugging the shrug closed and pulling up the neck of the tank. Gotta work on that.
@nubby @Angeline I've been trying this out for a while with women, but I always seem to get so self-conscious with men and I always walk away kicking myself for not talking more, even when they talk to me first. I need to stop being afraid of looking like an idiot in front of other people.
@HildaCorners, Lisa Eldridge's videos are really great! I always feel it's hard to follow make-up tutorials because they seem to suppose I have so much more knowledge/equipment than I actually do, even when they're designed for beginners. I've been using celebrity before and after photos as inspiration to keep trying, lately. They really do give me hope.
@growingafamily, I think I have a pretty good idea where most of my insecurity comes from, and identifying that and trying to move away from it has gotten me to the point where I can feel comfortable enough to even try improving. And yeah, the green dress is gorgeous!
@markymapo I know in one of those pictures I was trying hard not to laugh ('cause I felt awfully ridiculous talking selfies in my pajamas...) so I might have been frowning a bit to compensate. I have a couple friends that I occasionally go out with, but not often, and all my hobbies are by nature very solitary. I have a very hard time meeting new people. I never know where to start.
@Maria, I really love those hairstyles, especially the last one! It's kind of funny, my eyes are one of my features I've always been really self-conscious about. It was part of why I opted for glasses over contacts.
If you strike out, oh well! there will be another person coming along.
We all imagine that other people remember all our awkward goofs, really, they don't! They are FAR too concerned with their own awkward shit to even think about it when you're out of their line of sight.
We just aren't that important to other people that they are cataloging our faux pas.
That isn't meant to be cruel, it's meant to give you some breathing room. You get to be who you are, right out in front of other people!
Remember to play!
Do the right thing, whether anyone is watching or not.
Be married, until you are not.
Email address: angeline.greenwood@att.net
"RE feeling like an idiot for being shy - don't forget that many guys will find that cute and endearing and will want to protect you. A sweet, shy smile will take the place of a thousand words, if you can at least take a peek at his eyes or face before looking down. Heck, women practice that shit because it's like catnip. If you can't work on speaking yet, then try to work on body language. Turn your shoulders and your knees toward the person who's talking to you. Reach out and make a little touch on the arm when you laugh. Peek up at them if you can."
Practice that shit
Ba Bam
Fate favors the prepared.
Seeing everyone is working on the evening dress and swimsuit rounds, I'd like to focus on the talent portion of the show.
What do you do for work? What do you do for fun? What excites you?
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"The turnaround is tremendous. And I'm lifting weights, eating better, and tackling projects. I have all this great energy without a vampire sucking my life force.
He's a lot stronger standing on his own two feet, as well." - Scarlet
Your pictures remind me of one of those movies where some hot hollywood star has to spend the first half of the movie looking unattractive. You know, hunched over with a cardigan or something. It's obvious the actor is actually hot but that they are working hard not to be. (also this applies to just about every actor in the TV show, "the Big Bang Theory." Have a look online for celebrity snaps of those 'nerds' in real life).
Top priority is your hair. I'm not an expert and neither are you, so go talk to an expert. Hairdressers are the experts on this topic. This is what they live for, so go find one and let them help you.
Glasses could probably work for you but somehow those ones don't seem to create much magic.
Your clothes are fine... they are vibrant, exude personality, and most importantly, advertise your great body. Also I suspect you are using your dress style as a signalling device about the sort of people you are interested in.
But as Athol said - let's hear more about you!
Yeah more easily said than done, but it need to be done.
When you feel lonely and sad:
1. I feel the love of those who are not physically around me.
2. I take pleasure in my own solitude.
3. I am too big a gift to this world to feel self-pity.
4. I love and approve of myself.
Fate favors the prepared.
When you feel insignificant:
10. I am a unique child of this world.
11. I have as much brightness to offer the world as the next person.
12. I matter and what I have to offer this world also matters.
13. I may be one in 7 billion but I am also one in 7 billion.
Fate favors the prepared.
When you are nervous or afraid:
14. I trust my inner wisdom and intuition.
15. I breathe in calmness and breathe out nervousness.
16. This situation works out for my highest good.
17. Wonderful things unfold before me.
Fate favors the prepared.
When you are around strangers:
42. I am beautiful and smart and that’s how everyone sees me.
43. I take comfort in the fact that I can always leave this situation.
44. I never know what amazing incredible person I will meet next.
45. The company of strangers teaches me more about my own likes and dislikes.
Fate favors the prepared.
When you want to do more with your life but feel stuck:
77. I attempt all – not some – possible ways to get unstuck.
78. I seek a new way of thinking about this situation.
79. The answer is right before me, even if I am not seeing it yet.
80. I believe in my ability to unlock the way and set myself free.
When you can’t stop comparing yourself to others:
81. I have no right to compare myself to anyone for I do not know their whole story.
82. I compare myself only to my highest self.
83. I choose to see the light that I am to this world.
84. I am happy in my own skin and in my own circumstances.
85. I see myself as a gift to my people and community and nation.
Fate favors the prepared.
Not Dead Can't Quit
Fate favors the prepared.
Maybe the guy whose site you're reading knows what he's talking about ... and maybe he's just some guy sitting in his mom's basement.
You've got to separate the wheat from the chaff. Those who give practical advice that empowers you to make the necessary changes are worth your time; those who spin endless negative energy and tell you you're worthless should be avoided like the plague.
That goes for real life, too. Read the section in the Map book on vampires.
If you met some of these people on the street, you wouldn't stop to give them the time of day. Why let them sit on your jury?
Who else is on your jury making you feel unattractive? Time to boot them off.
The Secret to Why Your Wife Doesn't Initiate; Top Two Reasons Your Husband Doesn't Want Sex; Dominance-It's Not a Bad Word; Top 10 Ways to Increase Testosterone Naturally
I immediately think of Miss Congeniality.
And agree on the hair as a starting point.
One Hour Call 12-Week Guided MAP
"The turnaround is tremendous. And I'm lifting weights, eating better, and tackling projects. I have all this great energy without a vampire sucking my life force.
He's a lot stronger standing on his own two feet, as well." - Scarlet
Maybe get contacts, but wear glasses that make you comfortable? That way you can buy more without having to get the prescriptions. And have someone at the glasses store help you pick out some frames that match you, because your choices may be based on your shyness.
I have never been shy, but you can start by talking to people that you dont want to have a conversation with. I frequently talk to pretty much every person at the any store, gas station, starbucks line, whatever, lol. Anyone that enters my 6 foot radius, knows I am there. If you are not concerned with the outcome of the conversation, you cant mess it up, right?
The other day, in the produce section, I started knocking on the bananas. A lady was standing next to me and was watching me with a frown. I said," Isnt this how you are supposed to check to see if they are ripe?" and slight pause and she started laughing. It was a silly simple interaction, no harm done, and we chatted about how they had rearranged everything blah blah blah. but I really couldnt fail, because it didnt matter.
I'll echo Jek's comments above - something I have also recommended many times here. These are Zero Risk interactions. Talk to people. The garbage man, the security guard, the toll booth cashier, the bank teller, the kid with 127 piercings making your sandwich. Engage them - smile. Say something funny. Whatever.
Practice. Make eye contact. Smile.
Lather, rinse, repeat. This will help kill off that Shyness.
Welcome aboard.
How will you live well today?