Intro & My Triage - Losing Attraction to my Fiancee & Don't Know What to Do

Husband3point0

htx2008 said:

Husband3point0 said:

There's a big difference between emotional support and emotional crutch. Are you capable of being the former but unwilling to be the latter?  Because if so, then that's healthy IMHO. 

This is exactly how I feel. I've definitely been the former throughout our relationship, but the last few months I've felt like a crutch. It's become emotionally draining. I've definitely done the "boo the villains/cheer the heroes" for her work issues... she has thanked me and said I've been a great support and provided great advice. it's just that it's become groundhog day every single day with the same complaints and story.

I want to be there for her, I really do. I can support her, I just can't be the sole source of support anymore and need her to get help.

Well then, I'm here to tell you that it definitely won't get remotely better on its own and will almost definitely get demonstrably and horribly worse if not treated. If you want this to improve and avoid importing this into your marriage permanently, then I believe you will need to demand that she begin to address this with a therapist as a contingency of the wedding. 

Fixing this is year zero is a LOT easier than in year twenty. Trust me. 

DaddyOh

Agree with everyone else on postpone/canceling the wedding.
I can't relate to anxiety attacks, but after your clarification, I think you did your best, given the circumstance. Plus it's not your job to dive deep into her bachelorette party. This is "her" time. 

And if she's having issues with her friends at her own party it speaks volume about her relationship dynamic.