New date etiquette

never_again

Met a woman, went out once, had a blast, she did, too.  

She's going out with a gf tomorrow to a comedy show, and there's dancing after.  Her friend will leave after the comedy show and she asked me to meet her to dance.

First time in forever that I'm going dancing with a woman.  I go to a lot of singles dances and meet women there, but this is the first time I'm going to a dance with a woman as a couple and it's at a club, not a singles dance.  

She's hot.  Seriously hot.  Says she's wearing a mini tomorrow.  I'm expecting other guys to come up and ask her to dance.  How do I handle it?  

Frankly, my plan is to keep her on the floor as much as I can myself, simply because I like dancing and I'm sure I'll like dancing with her.  But I waver between mate-guarding (I know, I just met her) or letting her decide if she wants to dance with someone else.  One seems possessive asshole at this point and the other seems beta chump (sure, take my woman).

LadyOrTheTyger

I was taught, you dance with the one that brought you.  If you're on a date with someone, it's bad manners to dance with someone else.  When I've been on a date with a gentleman at a place that has dancing and a different gentleman asks me to dance, I politely decline and say I'm with my date.  

That said, not everyone believes this way.  When in doubt, use your words.  Ask her in a cocky funny pseudo-middle school way, "So is this like a date date?"  If she says no, there's your answer.  If she says yes, put your arm around her and growl in her ear, "That means you're only allowed to dance with me."  

And then, of course, you can't ask other women to dance either.  

never_again

@LadyOrTheTyger Perfect!  Exactly what I was looking for.  I thought she should decline but was worried that it was DLV if I left it to her to do it, rather than sending the guy on his way myself.

NeverSleptOnTheCouch

On the other hand, why put such constraints on a new girl. Let her act herself, and know right away if she is into you 

LadyOrTheTyger

Because  even if someone isn't into me, he or she can damn well have manners until the date is over. It's insulting to dance or flirt with someone else on a date. 

never_again

Thanks for the comments.  I was just a bit apprehensive because this is a situation I hadn't encountered in almost 15 years.  

Not a huge crowd but she was very attentive and into me.  She knows the bouncers and some of the wait-staff and introduced me to them (she goes there about once a month) but wasn't buzzing/chatty with anyone else.  

It ended very well.  I cooked her breakfast while she walked her dog this morning.

EANx

I gave you an awesome on the breakfast but it comes with the caveat that a person (her) who leaves someone they have dated twice (you), alone in their home for an extended period (more than 5 min in the bathroom), bears watching as someone who might want to move a relationship rather quickly.

never_again

@EANx, agreed.  Already have her flagged as a fast-mover and will act accordingly.

Also passed the "would you shave your beard if I asked you" fitness test.

Aklattle

never_again said:

@EANx, agreed.  Already have her flagged as a fast-mover and will act accordingly.

Also passed the "would you shave your beard if I asked you" fitness test.

What did you say? 

Reborn

Or "would you shave your ***** if I asked you?" ?

never_again

{cocky grin} "No".  Then I groped her.

@Reborn, that was not an issue.  

never_again

So Betty Boop has done a bit of indoor rock climbing.  She's a bit competitive.  Said she could kick my butt.  Wants to bet on it.

I've never done it but always like to try something new.  She said loser shaves their beard.  Since she doesn't have one, I said she needs to try AS.

Mistake?  Will I take an alpha hit if I lose (can't really gauge my odds)?  

I'm not worried about losing, just wondering if it will be a DLV if I do.

Angeline

Not if you can toss her over your shoulder and carry her to bed

Angeline

(With sneaky smile) "Gettin' kinda lippy there, missy. Gonna have to give you a spanking."

never_again

Actually, on our first date I mused that I could lift her over my head.  She asked what I would do if I did.  I said "Carry you to the bed."

And we've discussed the spanking for misbehaviours.  She's on board.

Thanks, sounds like I'm checking the right boxes.

Angeline

Cdr. Awesome gets a huge kick out of it when I beat him at something. He boasts about it. It's one of his more endearing traits. He jokes about me taking his Man Card by shooting better (just that one time, but he still brags about it), or darts, or that time I pointed out a tactical/security flaw before he did, or if we're playing any kind of game. Then he'll clean my clock at something else, and I'll stamp my foot and pretend-pout. All fun. It's so nice to not worry about it.

LadyOrTheTyger

If she "tries" anal on a rock climbing bet, she's "tried" it before.  

leoslayer

Well I'm late to the party but my view is she can dance with whoever she wants she's still fucking me at the end of the night so IDGAF.

So if a guy asks her and she says yes I don't worry about it. I'm typically one of the best dancers in there so odds are he's going to look bad anyway.

never_again

Actually, she's started coming to my dance lessons with me (and picking it up very fast), so things are going well.

@LadyOrTheTyger she told me she tried AS once in her 20's and hadn't since.  

LadyOrTheTyger

Lol I'm sure she did.  

never_again

Well, I'm not one to ask permission for various sex so when the time is right I'll go for it.  Much less likely to refuse than if I ask her permission first.