Pregnant girl game?

Natalie_Lorin

Ok, I feel a little weird posting this, but the nurse said the numbers were legit. Anyway, just got the news that we're expecting, and I'm feeling slightly paranoid about losing my girl game/libido over the next 7-8 months. For various reasons (low thyroid, BSC mom induced depression, etc) I haven't exactly been on top of my game, and I was really just getting back into exercising regularly when we were royally stunned by the recent events. I'll add that we're ecstatic and that the stunned part is because I had just started doing the basic infertility checks with the lady doctor. He's going to be surprised to see me

Any suggestions on exercising and/or keeping my libido up? I'm fairly HD - stress can kill my libido, but even then I get cranky as hell if I go too long. Husband and I are pretty evenly matched actually. As for exercise - I'm in moderately good shape. We backpack and hike, and I worked out a fair bit in college. I can usually get back into things pretty fast - started with knee push-ups and squats recently. I'd like to get in some full push-ups before the belly gets in the way.

Just please tell me I won't morph into a flabby, sexless gestational monster, or at least tell me the kiddos are worth it   (Who am I kidding - I'm already thinking about first Christmas and calculating when this one will be old enough to take camping.)

Edited to add: The depression is nearly gone thanks to some grit and some good counseling. It doesn't seem to be a medical issue. The counselor said that growing up with my mom was enough reason by itself! And the thyroid thing is in order. Probably why I switched from "annovulatory" to "obviously ovulated at some point." Mentally and physically I'm in a pretty darn good place. Well, I think my arms are too flabby. But now I'm rambling.

Hamster_Free

Congrats! 

  :-bd

Every woman and pregnancy is different, but my experience tells me that the 1st trimester can suck a bit since your body's gearing up for full time child nourishment.  The 2nd trimester, though, is when your body has figured it out and you get *the glow*.  3rd trimester is more of the same until you get to the last few weeks when all the cartilage is all loose and bendy and there's a kid in your lungs/stomach/intestines. 

The good news--I lost weight in my first trimester.  I gained a bit over the pregnancy, but lost it all right after #1 was born.  This was when DH was pouring on the beta support through cooking healthy, veggie and omega 3 meats in.  #2, however..... I had a much more carb based diet and kept the weight after that.  So my takeaway is quality diet will affect how your body manages your weight. 

Keeping moving is good, but forgive yourself if you're just too tired sometimes.  Understand, your body is already doing tons of stuff already.  If you *can.* *not.* drag yourself off the bed, SLEEP.  Your body needs that too.  Do you know that you generate an additional 20% of blood volume over the course of a pregnancy?  And that blood is made in your bones?  So your WHOLE BODY is working.  Feed it well --and ignore the diet nazis that say you can't eat anything because of the micro whatever that might have an effect on .0008 % of the population.  Eat healthy, and live well. 

 

:x

Jane

@Natalie_Lorin: CONGRATULATIONS!!!!  Wonderful news since you were just starting infertity work up!  I sincerely hope things go smoothly for you all the way through.   I'm currently 23 weeks pregnant and the group on this board has been WONDERFUL about honestly answering questions (especially the weird one's that I don't want to ask my doc about:  i.e. "what about nipple play during lactation?").  This is a really positive group, so welcome!  

That being said, I'm really sorry for what you're about to go through.  Before I got pregnant, I always thought that pregnant women were kinda whiney, now i'm well aware that they were DOWNPLAYING how bad it is!  Of course every pregnancy is different, but I'll let you know about my experience so far - pregnancy sucks; thank god you get a baby at the end of it!  The first 3-4 months were by far the worst of my entire life and during that time I was pretty sure that my previous plans of 4 kids were gonna get swapped out for "one is plenty."  The exhaustion and moodyness came on really really quick.  I was shocked how fast it came - like week 5 or so.  And I'm talking sleeping 12 hours at night, taking a nap on my lunch break and still feeling warn out all the time...and then around week 6 or 7 the nausea started, which is a million times worse than you'd imagine.  It's HORRENDOUS trying to get ready for work when you can't stop puking.  There's nothing worse than puking in a public toilet for so long that you wet your pants and tears are streaming down your face.  It's aweful....and then at some point it starts to get a little better.  for me around week 20, the nausea settled down a LOT and the constant exhaustion just went away.  I'm not completely without puking, but now it's only a few times a week which is certainly managable compared to the 24-7 nonstop wreaching that was happening before...

When it's bad, you're simply in "survival mode"  dont expect to do ANYTHING that isn't an absolute MUST. Cut yourself some slack.  

My belly started getting thicker really soon and by week 8 i couldnt button my pants.  It's tough to swallow, but if you get to that (and lots of women dont show very earlly for their first one!)  Just go out and buy the maternity pants.  I seriously wish I did that sooner.  It's a lot easier to be in cute maternity pants than squeezing your muffin top into your normal pants.  I started feeling better about myself once I got into the maternity stuff and now that I really do LOOK pregnant, I feel SOOOOO much better about my body.  it's that early period where you just look fat, not pregnant, that's really hard mentally!

My husbands attraction toward me doesn't seem to change and things actually got better for us in that department bc my sex drive dropped (I was the high drive partner) to about equal with his so now we both describe our frequency  (4 times a week) as about perfect even though before the pregnancy that wouldnt have been enough for me.  The one thing about all of it that's a plus is - damn the boobs look good.   I've always been fairly busty: 34D at a size 4/6 (5'7")  and by week 10 i was  up to a 34DDD and damn they looked great: full and firm.  They're pretty sensitive, so our technique had to change a tad, but they really are lovely...

The advise i'd give you:  If you're working out now, keep doing it!  it will be REALLY hard once you start getting sick, keep it up as long as you can and pick it back up whenever you're able.  I'm just getting back into it and man it's hard after all that time off!  I was a pretty avid exerciser (marathon runner, weights, yoga classes etc) before I got pregnant, but when the morning sickness started i couldnt do ANYTHING.  I gained more weight than i should have early on and I'm really feeling that now (get out of breath climbing stairs, cant get up and down from the couch easily).  I dont know that i really was capable of doing anything differently though:  I really couldnt work out and I was eatting whatever i could to keep the nausea at bay...but I wish I would have pushed a little longer with the working out...It's SOOOOO hard to restart now at 20 lbs heavier!!!

Natalie_Lorin

@ Jane, I'm so sorry. I'm almost six weeks, and so far the nausea has been manageable - more like a constant state of butterflies than anything else.

Thanks for the encouragement. Diet is pretty good - meat and veggies. Lots of fruit/yogurt smoothies. You'd think I shouldn't have weight issues except that stress seems to make me fat (cortisol is evil), and really I'm not that overweight. I think some of it was my mom projecting her skin and bones boy figure onto my rather curvier figure. (Seriously - boobs must weigh something.) Really at this point I'd just like a little tone to go under the overall baby puffiness most people seem to get  

Renvers

I posted a thread similar to this, life has just gotten better for me at 14 weeks, back at the gym and weaning myself off simple carbs. I think for the frist 12 weeks just do what you can, I bloated up really quickly and am only just beginning to look pregnant. . I've tried to be receptive to DF's advances, only turning him down when I've felt REALLY sick. Sex actually makes it better.

hopingformore

Congratulations!!!
The reality is that no one has any idea what any pregnancy will bring.  Everyone is different and every pregnancy is different.  You kind of just have to roll with it.  Do your best, keep your attitude as good as it "can" be (which sometimes is glorious and other times is pure shit)... and just be aware.  I wish you the very very very best!!!
(Says the girl who's had 4 babies, each pregnancy different, some no sex drive, others daily needs for multiple orgasms.  Who sometimes bounces back fast and sometimes does not. Who tried to make good choices but gave in to sometimes not being able to.  Just saying.) 

Natalie_Lorin

Well so far we know that pregnancy is good for my husband's libido Good times!

I really appreciate the encouragement and advice. My mom is BSC, so there's really only 2-3 women I can to about this in real life (and I really don't want to ask my MIL about sex and pregnancy). We figure that we'll save the general announcements for later.

Honestly the biggest deal is that this really heals something for me. I've read all the blogs about marrying young when you're fertile and all that, and it kind of hurt. We got married the summer I graduated college, and I really was a virgin's virgin. Dated like three guys, only kissed one. (Athol if you read this it's not as crazy as it sounds. Ring on finger = making out for an hour before church. And possibly an hour afterwards. I can't really remember. Either way, I was clearly into him.) Anyway, we'd done what you're "supposed" to do. Then we waited. And waited. And waited. Six years! Admittedly those were six (mostly) great years of growing and traveling and just having a heck of a lot of fun together. The timing here is great because we're finally in a house and my head is screwed on (mostly) straight, but it's so hard not to feel broken when your body just won't work right. And I know my husband wants kids. He's always roughhousing with the boys after church, and I've seen him have all the little girls chasing him and begging for attention. Guy has serious kid game I tell you ;;) Anyway, yep. Excited. Glad to not feel like my body is working against me.

The worst part I'm anticipating right now? Being pregnant in August/September in Alabama @-) It gets hot!

rangerwifey

Congratulations!!! I think girl game during pregnancy just like pregnancy itself is an individual deal. I loved being pregnant, loved my body, my self esteem was through the roof! I had morning sickness but once that went away I just continued to be my little sexy self! I bought clothes that mirrored my non pregnant style! I never went for frumpy sweats, ugly jeans, huge tops etc! Thank God I found stuff I FELT good in! That's very important how you feel will help you tackle the challenges of carrying those extra pounds proudly.

Sexy undies (thongs remained for me) and sexy nighties also remained.

I didn't do more than yoga and walking.... I was high risk but I felt great! Wore a two piece during my 8 and 9 month my last pregnancy and felt great! I live in Georgia so heat and humidity in summer equals lots of time at the pool!

Again congrats! Make it memorable and do not worry about the little imperfections you are creating life!!!

Renvers

Buy the nicest, best fitting clothes you can afford and rocks the boobs. I found last time that I got into a baking/cooking frenzy, not forgetting the mad nesting towards the end.

Raspberry_rose

Congratulations! So happy for you!

Scarlet

Congratulations!