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Starting off on the right foot
LostOne
Member Posts: 45
Hey everyone,
I probably should have posted in here before jumping into the Emergency 911 board, but looking back I suppose it worked as intended. Either way, I'd like to post a little about myself here, as I hope to use this forum as I continue my MAP and start a new(ish) life.
I'm 27 years old, and my wife of four years and I filed for divorce today, jointly, through a mediator. It's going to be a long road, but we got a lot out of the way, and so far we're doing okay at staying amicable. I hope it stays that way. I am retaining primary physical custody of our two kids - my 2.5 yo son and 1 yo daughter. I have absolutely no idea how to function as a single father (though I can keep the kids fed, clothed, and clean), and it's something I never wanted to have to do, but here I am.
I'm going back to college to complete my BS in Economics, which will take me another two years. I'm a veteran, so the GI Bill will support me financially through this, and I have investments to supplement. The program is solid, with a 100% placement rate, usually with firms in the minerals or energy sector. I plan to take this two years to become the best man I can be, and put my life back on the right track.
My biggest concern at this point is a perceived lack of emotional support I know there are people who care about me, some much more than I ever realized until going through this process, but I still feel disconnected from people, and it's difficult to ask people for help. I am seeing a counselor to help me through the worst of it, but I really need to rebuild a social circle, something that my STBX discouraged over the course of our marriage. Right now it feels like I will never be able to make new friends, never be able to handle dating again, etc. I know that's silly, because I meet new people every day and can carry on a good conversation and build rapport, but the perception bothers me, and I need to address it.
Any advice anyone can give on successful single parenting, getting back out into the social world (while managing small children at home), or just general advice about anything if you feel you have something useful to say, I would more than appreciate it.
Thank you all.
I probably should have posted in here before jumping into the Emergency 911 board, but looking back I suppose it worked as intended. Either way, I'd like to post a little about myself here, as I hope to use this forum as I continue my MAP and start a new(ish) life.
I'm 27 years old, and my wife of four years and I filed for divorce today, jointly, through a mediator. It's going to be a long road, but we got a lot out of the way, and so far we're doing okay at staying amicable. I hope it stays that way. I am retaining primary physical custody of our two kids - my 2.5 yo son and 1 yo daughter. I have absolutely no idea how to function as a single father (though I can keep the kids fed, clothed, and clean), and it's something I never wanted to have to do, but here I am.
I'm going back to college to complete my BS in Economics, which will take me another two years. I'm a veteran, so the GI Bill will support me financially through this, and I have investments to supplement. The program is solid, with a 100% placement rate, usually with firms in the minerals or energy sector. I plan to take this two years to become the best man I can be, and put my life back on the right track.
My biggest concern at this point is a perceived lack of emotional support I know there are people who care about me, some much more than I ever realized until going through this process, but I still feel disconnected from people, and it's difficult to ask people for help. I am seeing a counselor to help me through the worst of it, but I really need to rebuild a social circle, something that my STBX discouraged over the course of our marriage. Right now it feels like I will never be able to make new friends, never be able to handle dating again, etc. I know that's silly, because I meet new people every day and can carry on a good conversation and build rapport, but the perception bothers me, and I need to address it.
Any advice anyone can give on successful single parenting, getting back out into the social world (while managing small children at home), or just general advice about anything if you feel you have something useful to say, I would more than appreciate it.
Thank you all.
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Comments
Any family support at all? Parents or sibs? I apologize if you've already covered this in your other thread.
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I have a brother in town who has actually done way more than I thought he was capable. He and his wife have offered to watch the kids pretty much whenever I need them to help out. I don't want to abuse the privilege, but I do appreciate it a ton. He's not really an emotional support kind of guy, though, and I don't really have that here.
My parents live 16 hours away, so their support is rare. In the middle of my wife's affair, I had an emotional breakdown and my mom seemed more concerned that she was going to miss a Lenten service than she was worried about my issues. My dad is a conservative Lutheran minister, and if we share more than a few dozen meaningful words in a year, something is amiss. In any case, I wouldn't exactly say that I have a loving family - I know they care about me on some level, but it feels conditional, and that's not at all what I need right now.