The most important shit test I have ever faced is coming up in 3 weeks and will set the stage for the rest of my life...I need help! I am very excited to be getting married next month. I am 35 and she is a year younger, so we have both had our share of experiences (me considerably more than her).
Cuttin to the chase: Since the beginning of our relationship she has refused anal sex, saying that she would only give it up on our wedding night. I always laughed and teased her little ass with a finger or a thumb while nailing her from behind, but she always refused to take my cock saying the usual, "Not until we get married!" Well goddamn it we are getting married. Not so that I can bang her in the ass, I assure you. In fact, anal sexdoesn't really appeal to me (ok, a little bit) and I KNOW she is not interested in it. HOWEVER, she has been holding out for so long with the same line of, "not until our wedding night" that I expect to be balls deep in her booty hole five minutes after I throw her onto the bed after we take our vows. Only now, 3 weeks before our wedding date, she is backing out of the deal. When I bring it up she is telling me that I can't be serious. So far I have stood firm in my aloofness, cracking jokes about how I will be gentle but will have to carry her into the honeymoon suite as tradition and carry her out of the honeymoon suite because she won't be able to walk. She is flat out refusing to do it, in her laughing, joking way.
I see what this is. It is a shit test. On my wedding night. This will set the stage for the rest of our marriage. Now, considering that this will be my wife and not some slut from the bar, I have to approach this with a bit more finesse than I normally would. I have a bit of time to decide how to play this so I look forward to hear your thoughts. I will also let you know how it turns out!
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Comments
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Fuck Culture. Live your life - Beatrice
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Fuck Culture. Live your life - Beatrice
Unless you plan to ply her with enough alcohol that she forgets the experience, I think it would be a huge mistake to force this issue.
I think it would be appropriate to confront her on the stall tactic. Make it less about the sex and more about the communication. Why did she feel the need to dangle this out there like a carrot if she knew she wasn't willing to follow through?
I would feel much more comfortable confronting this issue immediately rather than trying to force her to follow through on a physical commitment that would likely be a huge failure even if she did want to participate.
Just my .02. Good luck.
Based on the members email he appears to be posting from his "real person" email address, so I think this isn't a troll question.
The trouble is this lose-lose outcome. Either she does something she clearly doesn't want to do, or you fold on something that's been held to you as a marriage incentive.
I think "When we're married" is akin to her saying, "That will never happen". My concern that she's apparently not into you enough / trusting of you, to even be willing to try this once.
How is the rest of the relationship?
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"The turnaround is tremendous. And I'm lifting weights, eating better, and tackling projects. I have all this great energy without a vampire sucking my life force. He's a lot stronger standing on his own two feet, as well." - Scarlet
Have you yourself ever done this before? I don't think you can just plan for a certain day to have anal for the first time. I think working your way there slowly will get you better results. The truth is that if the woman is at all nervous or tense, it's gonna hurt so bad, you'll probably never even see her butt again. A finger here and there during regular intercourse, and other anal play will help slowly get a woman comfortable. For a woman this is a highly embarrassing thing to be curious about, to try and to like and if you rush at her on 1 day (and her wedding day at that!!!) it's likely to be a disaster.