Sit Rep

BrianC

Somehow I figured that it wouldn't take you much to see positive movement.  Keep us posted.

SaigoTakamori

so I realized I have been doing my "shout outs and Spelling the damn names wrong!!  ARGHH!!!!

so please accept my apologies 

SaigoTakamori

So.. roofing tiles are heavy  and I am not capable yet of picking up 4 bales at once!    Oh yea and my back hurts too.

SaigoTakamori

At work, getting ready to go to gym.  Bride texts telling me to take it easy today.   I have Far to travel on this road. I know I kind of tweeked myself moving those Dam Blasted tiles.. I do not want to lose momentum I have been gaining.

kind of feel good, kind of tight in the back.  Ahh today is not dead lift day so it should be good.  

 

I just get depressed seeing I have soo very far to travel and, she still gives me some guff about taking charge in the bedroom.  We spoke about this, long story short.. i can say "I want you to do this"  that would be better than "Do this"

So as you can see, she just does not have that attraction to me yet. It really kills me to admit that, really does.  but I Can do something about that,  just it is Minimum a year down the road?

Blah!

Serenity

This is a marathon, not a sprint. You didn't get here overnight, you aren't going to fix it overnight.  That's my stern voice.  [-X

You are doing an awesome job.  :-bd  Keep up the hard work and stay patient with yourself.

Something I think will help you:

• Start a log detailing the positive things that happen. Make sure to record one every single day. When you get impatient, take your log out and read it.
  

SaigoTakamori

@Serenity ; Great Idea,   thanks!

SaigoTakamori

Feeling sick today,  had chills and fever last night.  Went to work, now going to call it a half day at 1300 and head home to sleep.

 

I think I am pushing myself too too hard, and weakened myself.   

On another note, We injured the wifes neck, she had to head to a chiopractor.  Umm Ooops.  But she did agree for us to get the Liberator wedge and ramp combo!   So that is good right?  I feel bad about her injury although she was the one asking for Hard...So I am assuaged from some of the guilt right?

Serenity

@BrianC should have some good advice for you on this.

SaigoTakamori said:

Feeling sick today,  had chills and fever last night.  Went to work, now going to call it a half day at 1300 and head home to sleep.

 

I think I am pushing myself too too hard, and weakened myself.   

On another note, We injured the wifes neck, she had to head to a chiopractor.  Umm Ooops.  But she did agree for us to get the Liberator wedge and ramp combo!   So that is good right?  I feel bad about her injury although she was the one asking for Hard...So I am assuaged from some of the guilt right?

BrianC

@Serenity, hah!  Which part? On pushing yourself too hard, on injuring your wife during sex, or on bondage gear?  We've been talking a lot lately... 

On pushing yourself too hard, there is a simple formula to remember (this one from my upcoming book):

If you are only running at 50%, giving people everything you've got is still only giving them 50%.  A man who sleeps well, eats well, and exercises well, and gets more done in an hour than a man who beats himself gets done in a day.

As for injuring your wife during sex.  She did ask, and it was an accident.  A few weeks ago I got a little too excided and sprained my wife's hip.  I was mortified, but she was (at least when she wasn't walking around) purring.  You showed her just how excited she gets you, that makes things pretty forgiveable.  She was firting with me seriously the next day.  And like a proper cowgirl the moment her leg was better she got ight back on the "horse."

If it is really bothering you there's two things you can do:

• Flirt with her relentlessly and tease her a bit about it.  If she accepts it with good nature, you can feel pretty secure in the fact that you did no harm.
  
• If that approach does't work for you, ask her how she flt about it.  Don't apologize (unless she really wants one), instead ask her how she's feeling, and if she wants you to be more careful on round two.  From the sounds of it, she's agreeing to a little more kink after the fact.  That is a very good sign.
  

Honestly it sounds like the only forgiveness that really needs to happen is from yourself.  You were giving her wht she wanted and making your marriage stronger in the process.  Although I am an ordained minister if you really need absolution.

As for the Liberator... I've been considering that one for a long tme.  Let me know how it works out. 

Serenity

That was me being discreet.  ;;)

BrianC said:

@Serenity, hah!  Which part? On pushing yourself too hard, on injuring your wife during sex, or on bondage gear?  We've been talking a lot lately... 

SaigoTakamori

Back today.  Went home early yesterday..went right to sleep.  Feeling much better today. 

 Did not exercise yesterday due feeling like doo doo. 

 Headed to gym today.. Wife wants me to take the day off, I told her I would go light today and "Hard Tonight"  lol  that did get an "OK"   This is the same woman who less than 3 months ago was like warm towards me...

 I am still amazed at how she responds to me having Command.  She texted me today re: working out and said "you really are bound and determined aren't you"   

 We had a discussion over dinner the other night.. I wanted her to send me a Descriptive sexy text.  She totally  wimped out and texted not anything exciting.  I called her on it and said "it is ok, you are just not that attracted to me yet".   Of course she balked and.. She went on about when we were younger and just married she was afraid of losing me and did those things..(dread)  Any way.. I just Keep working and melting off the Provtective Layer I have built up and the Awesome will show through!!  

Any way I try and Not Let that bother me.. She is responding, I am having PIV pretty much whenever I initiate,  she cuddles on me again,   so what is my problem Right?   Dont get me wrong.. the piv is good, I want to do MORE stuff and she resists that..  Not to be crude, but with All OF This  Testosterone I am building up by lifting..  I have this PRIMAL Urges  and just want to Consume Her!   Is this wrong?    Maybe it is Too Early .. I have only really been going at it for 3 months now so  Be Patient?  I dont know.. One step at a time.

@serenity ;  @brianc ;  Have both given me real good advice on this.

BrianC

It really is a marathon and not a sprint. If you keep going slow and steady you'll get what you want. 

It took me 4 years of hard work and patience; first with Justice Marshall, then with @Athol_Kay to get my marriage to the point it is now. and things are still getting naughtier as we go along.

In the meantime the best thing to do with those primal urges is the channel them into a team sport or a creative endeavor.

DaveBowman

Ok man, you're running yourself ragged and your T has your body amped up higher than a kite.

This is good, but the downside is you have the foot stomped down on a car with the engine out of tune and 3 of your plugs not firing.

Also watch for this sudden jump in T making you more aggro, and more horny for everything in a skirt. I went through about a month of this before I settled down.

Keep training, but aim to just keep pushing the bar forward, not jumping over it. Just 1% a day will do wonders in 6 months or a year.

Train a little even when you're sick. Move, stretch, light yoga, something.

When you hit a plateau on one red, put it on maintenance mode and work on the next red. Come back to it later when you plateau on something else.

"Teather even a roasted chicken."
- Yamamoto Tsunetomo

SaigoTakamori

Feeling better.

Gym last night,  Took @davebowman ; advice   and just  'Ran the engine a bit"

Bride went to chiopractor got adjusted, neck stil hurt.  She  waved me off  last night.  I really have learned alot, just maintained frame said ok   went my own way, took a shower came back to bed and we spent about 30-40 minutes looking at the liberator site picking out the one we wanted (she did not want the one With the restraints..)  But I made sure we ordered the one that had the Opton for it LATER

>-

SaigoTakamori

wrong button... anyway  so I am mapping like my hair is on fire.  Working on Me and  It is working.  So much to fix.  One step at a time.

 

Laters Taters!

Serenity

Even when I'm insanely attracted to my husband, I have a difficult time with sexting. It's a bit of a mental block for me. I'm not sure why. So don't assume that your wife isn't attracted to you just because she doesn't get into the sexting stuff.

From what you write, it seems that she really is attracted to you, at least part of the time. 

SaigoTakamori

So,

Went to chiropractor last night,  they weighed me.

Lost 12 pounds  Woot Woot    26 so far and getting muscles that wife constantly gropes on, though "I am  not turned on by muscles"    Load Of Mahlunkus!! This Hamster

Laters

SaigoTakamori

Liberator shapes come tomorrow..  Much To Do....Actually... ONE to DO!

SaigoTakamori

Liberator came in.  Used the wedge.  I like it.  Although she is starting to get close to starting, as a result she was  "yellow"  today.  So B-  C+ grade.

I had a meh partner, vanilla..  but  As @davebowman says    PIV is  A WIN!!

redheaded_woman

I'm ridiculously uncoordinated so adding some extra piece of equipment would make me paranoid the first time out.
Is my knee gonna slide off? Is the whole thing gonna slide away?

Whatever...just might be some part of why you considered it vanilla. She may have held back.