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  • BrianCBrianC Oshawa, ONGold Men Posts: 3,138
    Writing your plan out can make a big difference is how well you execute it.  What is blocking you from getting it done?

    All men are great men, most fail to see the greatness in themselves.

    Power, Passion, Principle and Purpose: The Wild Man Project

    My most popular articles: The Art of the Apology (also on video), The Basics of Assertiveness, The Art of Friendship

  • SenecaSeneca CanadaSilver Member Posts: 268
    BrianC said:
    Writing your plan out can make a big difference is how well you execute it.  What is blocking you from getting it done?
    Basically time.  More specifically, time when I can be alone for an extended period of time to put my thoughts in order.  Some of that is probably excuses on my part, but I don't have a lot of free time with a young daughter at home.  This, plus I coach a youth sports team, and this takes up a good 3-4 nights per week if not more.  I've been using the little free time I do get to read recently.  I think I need to put the reading on the back burner for a bit and write out my MAP.
  • BrianCBrianC Oshawa, ONGold Men Posts: 3,138

    Seneca said:
    BrianC said:
    Writing your plan out can make a big difference is how well you execute it.  What is blocking you from getting it done?
    Basically time.  More specifically, time when I can be alone for an extended period of time to put my thoughts in order.  Some of that is probably excuses on my part, but I don't have a lot of free time with a young daughter at home.  This, plus I coach a youth sports team, and this takes up a good 3-4 nights per week if not more.  I've been using the little free time I do get to read recently.  I think I need to put the reading on the back burner for a bit and write out my MAP.
    That would be a great move. The beauty of books is that they are not time sensitive most of the time.

    All men are great men, most fail to see the greatness in themselves.

    Power, Passion, Principle and Purpose: The Wild Man Project

    My most popular articles: The Art of the Apology (also on video), The Basics of Assertiveness, The Art of Friendship

  • sf64sf64 Střední Evropa na chvíliSilver Member Posts: 1,997
    Seneca,

    A belated welcome.  Glad you are here and actively working on your life.

    I do want to offer a word of caution.... one of the things about running the MAP is that it HAS to be about making you a better person, not about sex.  Better / more frequent sex can be one of the outcomes of running a strong MAP, but if you just run the MAP because you want better sex, you aren't going to get the results you can.

    The simple was to think about it is this.... "I am so unbelievably awesome my wife can't help herself.  She wants sex all the time and is up for anything."  All good.  But the goal is being awesome.  Because when you are awesome, all kinds of other great things happen too.  

    The issue with making sex the goal is that you measure progress based on sex.  And typically it doesn't work.  Measure progress based on the goal of being awesome.  What does being awesome look like to you?

    Note - If you a FO with a Lazy Bear or Low-T husband, ignore everything I say. It probably doesn't apply
    "As he works on his MAP, he's going to do things that piss you off. He has to."  - Steu2817
    "In a world of Alpha's there is no peace for anyone.....welcome to Somalia enjoy your stay" - Highlander2




    Templar
  • SenecaSeneca CanadaSilver Member Posts: 268
    @sf64

    That makes a lot of sense, and I think I understand that well.  It's basically the main piece of value that I got out of reading MMSLP and MAP.  The little updates I'm posting here right now are fairly disorganized because I haven't had a chance to sit down with pen and paper and put together my MAP.
  • SenecaSeneca CanadaSilver Member Posts: 268
    I've been in a lull for a week or so with my MAP.  My wife and daughter have been sick (this, almost immediately after I was sick for about a week).  I've managed to keep up with my current priority areas, specifically my eating better.  I've dropped around 10lbs since the beginning of January just through cutting calories.  I'm down to about 195 now, but that fluctuates daily.  I've also been slowly chipping away at home improvement type stuff - replaced base-boards around a few doors and am now in the process of painting those.  It's been hard to do much solitary activity with a <1 year old crawling around and a wife that's been a bit too sick to keep tabs on her.

    My energy is waning a bit as well.  I feel like taking time to reflect every few days is a good way of building back energy.  It's nice to stop and think about what I'm trying to accomplish, maybe write a bit, and then get back on track with a new found energy.  I haven't had the chance for that reflection or re-energizing lately.

    My wife seems to be feeling some better today.  Hopefully she gets back to health soon so we can divide up the load a bit again and free up some reflection time.

    Needless to say, I'm a bit down in the dumps today.
  • RedfordRedford The Great White NorthSilver Member Posts: 679
    @Senaca

    Have you beed depressed like this for long? Are you being evaluated by a professional? I think you need to look into that STAT. A lot of chronically depressed people don't realize they are because they've never experienced anything else.

    Also, regarding this:
    I know there are a lot of women who are curious about sex and sexuality and making it a fulfilling part of their lives.

    You need to keep in mind that the women on here are not representative of women in general. As a whole, we are probably much, much more sexually aware than a large portion of the female population. Don't use us as a comparison gauge for your wife, ok?
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