MiddleMan said:

ch102081 said:

@318JimmyNow you missed the part where the phone tracker showed his wife at OMs house for an hour today.   

3.5 hours. 

My wife had a long term affair.  It just sucks.  It's hard to put into words how awful it its.  
One man who had been through it described it this way: 

"while you barely have the strength to even get up off of the floor, this is when you need to be your strongest. It is like the cruelest joke of your life---worse than you could have even imagined."  That's my message of warning and of your need for strength.  

The message of hope:  Some survivors can honestly tell you they have better marriages.  I think The Dude, and Fredless are two such survivors.    I believe it's possible.

"He is still in love with my wife though. "

I implore you to contact him and his wife. He will continue to contact her and try to drive you two apart otherwise.

What did your lawyer say about sex with your wife after discovering the affair? In some states it is taken as forgiveness and affects your divorce settlement.

Agreed and in case it has not been said, do not tell your wife before u exposé him. Do not give anyone a hint that you r even considering it, just do it as far and wide as possible on his side.

Is there already a list like this?  I would like to read or reread some success stories.

For me wife goggles are a very real concept. And if they are damaged, they can be carefully repaired--possibly improved.  

MILF_in_training said:

What do you bring to your marriage?

Unfortunately I brought the egalitarian, blue-pill mindset.  But I adapt and overcome.