I totally get this.  100%.  It is my biggest issue.  I call it the death spiral.  After a while of no sex or affection I get grumpy, which is not attractive.  So no sex.  So I get more grumpy.  And so forth.  To the point that when I finally get a green light I actually sometimes shut it down.  Honestly, I'm so frustrated I'm not interested anymore.  I'm frustrated when she gets a cold, because there goes any chance for the forseeable future.  Or she travels, because that could mean many extra weeks.  And the idea of a quickie - no way, because somehow that "counts".  That's life on the low low side of average.  I end up spending much of my time in various states of grumpiness, imagining what case I'd make in the appeals court of infrequent sex.  Oh, the argument I could make.  Logically, morally, statisitically - I win!  It would be so, so easy to move us to a better place, simply by doing a tiny bit more of something that is enjoyable (and free!).  How can this even be a problem, I think.  

None of this has ever helped.

I think, well to me anyway, this is what MMSL is all about, and Zen, Taoism, etc.  Finding meaning elsewhere.  Realizing that it could be worse.  Having a good life anyway.  And not being grumpy all the time.  Sometimes I can even see that when I'm no longer in the death spiral, counting the weeks, I'll probably - for cosmic karma reasons I don't understand - end up having more sex.  Or not caring about it.  Or both.

Meanwhile, I'll be following this thread....

I know, right?

I never would have guessed it. But it works so much better.

How on Earth did I get stuck doing things the other way????

Ya'll have little zoologists and chemists in your homes!  That's awesome.  

....and maybe disguisting at times.  But mostly awesome. 

I feel that science has a responsibility to analyze her DNA and understand her superpowers.  

Both.  And it's ok.  It just limits my ability to cut back on "stuff".  

I think the real issue is not the "stuff" but how I deal with it and how I let it impact me.  I should be better about that.  For example, I don't have to feel the need to understand and solve every problem everyone has.  Or feel their pain all day long.  Then, I won't be worn out.  

I've got to change my avatar. Clarke's picture is a little to much.....