A marriage that goes south inside of the first year is very difficult to recover (ask me how I know).  However, the good thing is that you've recognized it and are taking steps to fix it now rather than 5-10 years from now.

So, in that regard, the simplest direction is to become the guy you were 2.5 years ago.  You're not that far removed timewise, so you should be able to work it out fairly quickly. 

The formula is 1 month of mapping per bad year of marriage.  It probably doesn't hold as true for short-term rather than long-term marriages because you've had a whole lot of damage done in a very short time rather than a cumulative problem.

But the number one thing is - do not let her get pregnant unless and until you are fully back on track.  That will make your problems worse, not better.

Hate to continue the hijack, but I consider myself a conservative libertarian.  Practicality says that chances of libertarians forming a gov't are slim so currently conservatives represent my worldview more completely than "progressives" or "liberals".  Primary consideration being that they're the more likely to leave me the fuck alone.